Kaylee: 7 Months

Kaylee turned 7 months old on the 24th!

Here are some of the things she’s done over the last month:

- She’s started babbling “mamama” and “dadada”.
- She recognizes the sign language sign for “milk” and can reproduce it while she’s eating.
- She can sit up on her own (when we put her there).
- She tries to give “kisses” by sticking her tongue out! I was playing around with her, giving her kisses, when she started sticking out her tongue, and I thought it was just random, but then she kept doing it. She’ll also just open her mouth.

And her official monthly pictures up until this point! I have other ones too that are beside a stuffed zebra, but I didn’t do the first month with those, and they’re also not all on my computer.

She’s starting to get hard to fit inside the circle/on the receiving blanket, lol!

It’s interesting to me how her face changed right after the first month into the same face she has today.

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This face.

Ever since Kaylee was born, I’ve been playing around with the idea of baby modeling.. I wonder what it takes to get started with something like that. Mostly just a passing thought though, but still, it would be kinda cool.. who could resist this face?!

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Late Night Musings

Taken from my journal:

sometimes my thoughts feel so removed and complex from the world around me that I feel burdened to share them.. i don’t want to have to explain a life long back story to be understood. even on paper they lack the nuance and depth of what i’m really thinking – i don’t think the words, but feel them – at the same time i have a need to send them off, put them out there.

to be robbed of joy is the worst thing a human can be, to despair to have to hope no promise.

please stop glorifying suicide. it’s insidious the pain that would put someone there but that doesn’t mean that they’re at peace now.. i wish I could say they were. I hope that they are because I hope that they were given a choice we don’t know, but to say that they are is to minimize, it’s a disservice – a cliche to make everyone else feel better that equally does nothing to help those who suffer with real mental illness.

real joy is in the soul. to see what looks like joy but to know the truth, is so deceptive.

so complex the human mind and emotions and frailty – what masks do i have – what walls do i put up – what is preventing my joy – what is hiding my soul?

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Baby Snuggles

GUYS. I love my baby so much.

♥ Baby snuggles

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Kaylee Smiles

Kaylee has smiled pretty much from birth – she started somewhere in the first week, which really surprised me because everything I read said babies generally start smiling much later. And she loved (and loves!) sticking her tongue out, just like her mommy, hehe.

This video was taken back in early February, when she was 9 days old.

Behold the cuteness! (I’m actually trying to kill you guys with cuteness..)

P.S. Proof she’s my daughter (taken around the same time).

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Kaylee: 6 Months

Hi guys! So, I had every intention of keeping up with this and then I just.. didn’t feel it. Not at all. And then I felt overwhelmed thinking about trying to catch up, so I decided I’m just not going to catch up, not really.

Kaylee turned 6 months old two weeks ago. She is rolling and scooching/army crawling, and she gets around really well this way, so I wouldn’t be surprised if she kept this up for awhile before actually crawling. She laughs and smiles all the time, she’s such a happy baby. She loves when I bite on her belly, she laughs hysterically. She has started noticing the cat and dog about a month or so ago and she really thinks they’re pretty funny, especially loves laying on the floor, kicking at the dog. And of course, she’s the most amazing, beautiful little thing on the entire planet. (And I love that she looks just like me..)

I’m breastfeeding and I intend on going for quite awhile yet, but I’ve started introducing a few solid foods, namely bananas, which she has sorta managed to get into her tummy haha.(These were taken by my husband.)

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Every month, I take pictures of Kaylee with her monthly sticker – I do one set on the floor on a blanket, and the other set in the nursery rocker, beside her stuffed zebra. I plan on putting the best of them together at the end of the year (and putting them in the baby book as well), and these are a bunch of them for this month!

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Kaylee Rae

I.. don’t even know where to start, lol! As you probably have figured out by now, I had my baby..

I couldn’t even begin to catch up in this post, so I’m not even going to try, but I guess I will at least announce her.. :)

Kaylee Rae Jones
January 24, 2014 at 2:53pm
7 lbs 2 oz, 18.5in

She is so beautiful and amazing in every way and I love her!

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Dreams: My (Future) Daughter

had my first dream ever about this baby girl inside of me! She was about three years old and really cute – I couldn’t see her face in details, but I could tell she had one of those really pretty faces that everytime I see them on another child, I fall in love. She had long-ish brown hair, in pigtails, and it was a little bit curly.

In the dream, she was kidnapped – sort of – we saw her being taken into two guys’ car and very angrily, Sam went racing across a Hobby Lobby parking lot to try to chase them down. Except, they stopped and told us that they weren’t taking her, but rather saw her alone and were trying to help her find her parents.

When she got out of the car, she ran up to Sam, grabbed his hand, and yelled, “Daddy!”

Ack, can this be more sweet – “seeing” my daughter – and having a “Daddy’s girl” moment?

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Pregnancy: January 19th, 2014

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Happy 40 Weeks! Today is my “official” due date, no baby girl yet. I’ve been having a lot of symptoms for over a week now, but nothing substantial enough.

Supposedly she has dropped and has been for a few weeks now, but she looks (and feels) so high in pictures. I think she’s facing my left side, and she keeps pressing really hard with her butt and feet (my poor ribs). I think I just have a short torso, haha.

Sam and I are really ready for her to get here! We have everything prepared as much as you possibly can and have just been kinda trying to relax. We walked the mall today, maybe that will jump start her. :)

We also found these really interesting books in Hallmark.

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They’re books that the mom and dad fill out about their own lives – details about their family, schools, growing up, first kiss, that sort of thing, and then you give them to your children so they can know about your history. I thought that was kind of cool.

Alright, moving on, come on Baby!

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Thoughts on Being an ENFJ

[15 Things ENFJs Wish You Knew About Us]

I don’t know how charismatic I am, but other than that, this sounds very much like me.

I think I figured something important out about myself, something others have probably realized very quickly, but I have been very slow about. I’ve often thought of myself as a lot more cold or unfeeling, shy or withdrawn than I really am naturally.

Note in this ENFJ article, a huge focus on close bonding and emotions – I think (know) that it is very possible I haven’t had enough of this in my life to meet my (strong) needs and so through the years I’ve learned to compensate by either withdrawaling from others or hiding my thoughts or feelings or trying to put on a “don’t care” attitude – I can even see this attitude when I was a child. (In the article, there is a reference to fight or flight when feeling exposed).

As a result I’ve started a never-ending cycle of not reaching out to people, not investing, not giving any of myself, despite it being very natural for me to jump in quickly and pour on very heavily. The truth is I know how deep and intense and sensitive I can be, but I have tried to hide it.

I can see the evidence of this coming out when I meet someone I really click with and I just kind of jump on them – I probably freak them out, because I get excited, especially if we bond quickly and heavily. I see the evidence in the past on how I’ve responded to all sorts of relationships – it’s very clear to me now how very much I need and seek out people.

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