the magic words
Monday, October 22nd, 2007I just paid my cell phone bill online, and soon after, I received an email thanking me for making a payment. Let’s be clear here: it was not thanking me for doing business with the company, or for using the online services they’ve provided, but for making a payment that is due on my account.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind appreciation, and I don’t mind a positive attitude, or encouragement. The world would be a pretty interesting place if we expressed more gratitude, and had a bit more in the way common decency. Goodness, even Barney the Dinosaur knows that: “…please and thank you. They’re called the magic words. If you want nice things to happen, they’re the words that should be heard!” (Yes, I know the song. Yes, I realise I was half-way to being an adult when this song came out. Do you have a problem with that?)
But, and I know I’m exaggerating this just a bit, but why in the world are they thanking me? Short of the natural reaction of “please and thank you” that occurs in superficial banter, thanking implies some sort of level of graciousness and appreciation–ya know, thankfulness. I’m positive they’re happy about getting their money, and they’re being polite and wanting to keep their customers happy, but have we really become such a self-esteem oriented society as to need thanks for doing something we should already be doing?
“Ooo, here’s a pat on the back for not screwing us over, k thanks.”
Credit card companies do this all the time. In fact, they go beyond this, and actually reward the consumer for making payments on time. Simply put, they rely on “positive reinforcement” tactics. Do you know where else positive reinforcement is used? In preschools! It’s used to teach right and wrong behaviour by relying on encouragement and positive response for good behaviour. We’re being treated like three, four and five year olds, and we’re supposed to be adults!
The point I’m trying to make (well, if there really is a point) isn’t so much that we lack responsibility for our actions, (even though our society really does), but rather that companies are having to rely on encouragement and positive reinforcement to get something that they should not have to beg for, something that is rightly theirs. They must beg and plead and treat the consumer as children, because frankly, the consumer thinks they’re owed something, that beyond basic respect, they’re owed for simply existing– that it’s some sort of privilege to receive something from them, even if it’s something that isn’t theirs to begin with. What an attitude! And, the thing is, it must work, because even though bill collectors and creditors still use scare tactics, more and more companies are going this route.
Why should they have to beg at all? And why, when they do beg, do they have to resort to basic right and wrong teaching strategies that are used in pre-kindergarten classrooms?
Do we really need our collective egos stroked just for being responsible for our own actions? How dare they NOT be gracious for a simple goods and services trade– for deigning to pay our bills– for keeping our end of the bargain!
What in the world is Barney teaching us?! (I kid. That purple dinosaur rocks.)